Wednesday, September 14, 2005

You Wanna Start Somethin’?

Actually – I think I have. I don’t want to blow my own horn, what with my awe-inspiring humility and all, but I may have planted a seed of change that could potentially grow into the vine of quiet revolution, while blossoming with the flower of environmental awareness in a quasi-socialist setting, unless the weeds of resistance choke it in its vulnerable budding stages, in the form of whoever in our neighbourhood is a stinky, rotten, by-law rat.

So, yeah – I bought a composter [On a terrible note – MS Word does not believe me that “composter” is a word. Right – “Schwarzenegger” is a word, but not composter – that pretty much sums up everything that is wrong with the world today].

It’s something I’ve wanted to do basically since I moved to Ottawa, but I’d never had the one requisite item – a yard. I started composting about grade 4, when we moved into our new house and got our shiny new composter and also because in BC we learn how to recycle before we can spell “recycle” and we’re all hippies in touch with Mother Earth anyway, so it just makes sense.

So, when I moved out to the ‘burbs, I decided, to DD’s mild alarm, that I wanted one. I want it, I want it, I want it whaaaaaaaah!!!!

Ahem. Or something like that.

Actually, he took it pretty well. We picked a model out together, I put it together while he made the stairs for the patio (no longer home to the drop-off of doom!) and sometime this week we’ll have enough “green” material to do a first layer, plus I scavenged some grass clippings and dry leaves for “brown” material, so we’re well on our way. It’s those fancy technical terms that I sued to calm DD’s fears of a gross, smelly rodent restaurant festering in our backyard.

Okay, there’s still a SMALL TINY INSIGNIFICANT risk of that, but in my mind, it is far outweighed by the benefits. Especially since we’ve been a healthier diet centered around lots and lots of fresh produce. I imagine it’ll take about 1/3 off our garbage output, and a hell of a weight off of my mind.

I’m fairly certain ours is the only composter on the block – but it already has the couple next door talking. And if the word gets around, and I can do what I can to spread the gospel, then you could soon see the rare sight of suburban Ontarians happily shuffling through two feet of snow with a pail of banana peels. And the stupid ass monkey on our street will be helpless to rat us out in face of our overwhelming compliance with local by-laws, and the thought alone of that buttface twisting in madness as his or her neighbours engage in a little good old-fashioned environmental-friendliness makes the whole thing worthwhile.

PS. We are on the lookout for the perfect compost pails – back in BC, we used the 4L Island Farms ice cream tubs, because they’re the right size, have have handles and tight-sealing lids, and come filled with sweet, delicious ice cream. However, Ontario seems to prefer to sell its ice cream without handles – I don’t know why, perhaps because they don’t compost. Anyway, if anyone in O-town spots such a pail, please let me know. Or if you’re coming up from Victoria and want to know what the perfect gift is for your gracious hostess, well, there you go.

PPS. I just followed my own link and it appears that Island Farms no longer sells 4L ice cream pails. Say it isn't so! For the love of all that is good and pure, say it isn't so!!!!!!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

BIOMASS! BIOMASS! BIOMASS! Yay Laura! Oh, but what about those winters I've heard about... does decomposition happen in those circumstances? Maybe you need a compost heater (solar powered?) to keep it from cryogenically freezing your wormes!