You can tell by this electronic communications device that I am important

One of my biggest peeves on this job is the constant use of these. The bastard child of cell phones and laptop computers, these little gizmos are EVERYWHERE at work. You're just not anybody if you don't have one, like in middle school with Club Monaco sweatshirts, only WAY more annoying.

Anyway, I like to pass my day making fun of people who are all addicted to their CrackBerries and mock them for their hip holsters, like, what are you, a digital cowboy in the Wild Wild Web?

And then we got one. At our office. Man, we don't even have cell phones. My co-worker and I sort of stared at it, half-fearfully, like primitive women after a lightening strike sets fire to some nearby bushes. Oooh, pretty! But what is it? Is it dangerous? Is it useful? Ow, it buuuuuuuuuurns!

I was really worried I'd turn into a CrackHead myself, but it turns out that my laziness overrides my need for social status. Although I did take a great deal of pleasure that we got the newer version which is smaller and sleeker and has a colour screen, boo yah losers!

Ahem...anyway, I haven't really bothered using it much. It takes for-freakin'-ever to type e-mails, especially since I stupidly refuse to compromise on capitalization, punctuation and sentence structure. Whatever, it looks pretty and it makes me feel special - it's like a trophy wife for political staffers!

In other news - if you guys aren't watching Monday Report you're missing the awesomest half-hour on TV. Be sure to check out the piece on Denmark from last week!It's satirific!